The ability of a thing or object to bounce back to its original shape. The capacity to recover quickly from difficulties.
If you want to be good at your work, then get to work on knowing your self.
Who here is at the end of their rope? Good, Now let go and move up.
There is a lot of talk in the corporate world about resilience. About staying the course and getting the edge, and all that. As though we have to stay tough when things get tough. Maintain our boundaries when the pressure gets turned up.
But I think resilience is a whole different cat. I think resilience is what you discover when you’re stretched past your boundaries, are pushed beyond, beyond your limits and compressed under so much pressure that you completely lose yourself. It’s after the chips are down, it’s after you lose your home, your relationship, your loved one, your everything. It’s after all that, and you realise your still alive, licking your wounds, crying your eyes out, soothing your soul and every non essential is stripped from you. It’s then you learn about resilience.
No one truly knows about resilience until you have paid the price of success in full. And some times that price is humiliating, soul destroying, crushing defeat.
When I was in my twenties I fell short of a goal I’d set for myself. My mentor at the time said to me “You learn more from a loss than you do from a win.”
At the time it was a bitter pill for me to swallow but one that would sow the seed of resilience that would rebuild my life.
Most people have been through hardship at least once but it really gets under my skin when people have a melt down over just one thing going wrong in their lives. I feel like saying. “Suck it up princess. When you have to move house as many times as me. Lost as many times as me. Been fucked over as many times as me, had to pick yourself up after being knocked down as many time as I have been, then we have something to talk about. Then we can bond over bitching. Till then, start again.”
You may find me harsh or without empathy after reading this, however that would be as un useful to you as crying over spilled milk.
In learning resilience one learns a universal truth. That truth is, that what ever survives the trials and tribulations of life is immortal. That which is immortal is in harmony with life and needs no protection to survive.
That is resilience.
Resilience is the effect, of that which is immortal in you.
So where to begin?
Think of the story of ‘The sword in the stone’. No one had to worry about anyone stealing the sword because only the ‘True King’ (not an imposter) could take it out, and when he did, he did it without any effort at all. There was no question in anyone’s mind that he was the King because everyone was free to try to take the sword at any time and could not. When Arthur took the sword all was there to see it and it was obvious to everyone, it was indisputable. All the people accepted this, there was no convincing, no selling, no doubt, it was absolute. People know the real deal when they see it. The only thing left to do after that is to position oneself in accordance with it.
When you find it, what’s resilient in you, you will see that it has always been there, that it always was there, and it will always be there, in this life and the next.
Everything we hold on to, resist and control is merely novelty, illusion and the devices we use to play the game of separation, insecurity, scarcity, lack and fear.
Sacrifice these things and you will be left with nothing but truth. And as the old saying goes ‘the truth shall set you free’.
It will set you free because it won’t need your effort and scurrying around, your control and manipulation, your deception and subversion to keep it alive. In short you’ll have all of your energy back, freed up to reinvest in more of what doesn’t need you, to sustain you. I call this being “Energetically Free”.
This is what people talk about when they talk about abundance, wealth, happiness. It’s the total trust that life supports you, even when it might appear that it’s being taken from you.
Going through the fire.
I see people in country areas who are fearful of fire, they’re scared of losing their homes, their stock their land to fire and with good reason There were some tragic loses of life in rural areas due to bush fire. As a result of these tragedies new laws and safety measures have been introduced and many lives in the future will be saved. My heart goes out to those people for their losses. The point is though, is that fire cleans the land of derbies, stagnation, pests, rot. It cleans the slate. After a period of time when the new growth comes back the land flourishes. Dormant seeds take to sprout and the new energy reconfigures the space to grow even better. In fact there are some seeds that cannot begin to grow until the fire goes through the area creating the conditions for life to begin. Life just keeps coming back, it’s relentless. You kill it one way and it comes back in another. You suppress it one way and it makes itself discoverable. You cut off one head two more grow back in its place. We waste so much energy holding the proverbial ‘cork’ below the surface, when it would be easier to let it rise and adjust. Sure, it’s not always comfortable in the beginning but the long term benefits out weigh the short term struggle. Just ask any one who’s gone through boot camp to loose weight and become healthy. No one ever said
to me, you know Brett, now that I have a six pack, I’m more attractive, have a great social and active life, I really miss the 30 kilos of fat I was dragging around with me for the last 20 years not to mention the bouts of depression and negative self talk. Not once has that ever happened!
They may not have liked the process when they were going through it but you can be sure they’re loving the results now.
You could say that being resilient is the art of skilfully letting go all that is un useful and no longer serves you. It is only the truly resilient that lead a life lacking in the superfluous.
Bruce Lee (the master) said “Everyone wants to know the way to win. Never the way to die. It is only when we learn to die can we be liberated from it. Learn the art of dying my friend”